Now, to the uneducated person, that sounds like I have a fairly decent ability to write german. Truth is, that took me at least 30 minutes to complete. And several rounds of editing. And reference to a german dictionary - more than five times. Without the dictionary, the only bits of the above that I would have got correct would have been:
Hallo! Ich heisse Melissa und ich bin neunundzwanzig Jahre alt. Ich bin eine Krankenschwester in einem Krankenhaus. Ich spreche ein bisschen Deutsch.